Then things turned wierd. Apparently there's this place in Utah where you can mummify your pet. Yes, for only $25,000 Fido can stand by your chair forever. They preserve the animal in a solution for months, and then the loving owner gets to watch as their beloved pet is removed from the fluid, wrapped in gauze, encased in fiberglass (the stuff used to make casts and on Navy ships, pipe patches), and then painted in several coats of polyurethane. The finishing touch is a coating of bronze, either shiny, dark, or enameled to fit with your decor. One of the pet owners (and both these ladies talked to their dead dogs) said that $25K wasn't such a big amount, given the love, devotion, and service the pet had provided.
Anyone with $25K to spare is more than welcome to send it to me, and I'll turn it into a fitting memorial to any deceased pet you like. I promise. I'll name the home's library after your pet, with a brass plaque and all. ;o)